Monday, January 13, 2014

Are You Our Kind of Weird?

My friend Mabel and I often say, "They aren't our kind of weird." We say it when someone doesn't understand what we're on about, or when a communication goes awkward, or just in general. "Our kind of weird" has never been defined, so I thought I'd give it a go. 

Now you can use this handy quiz to see if you're our kind of weird. I'm sure you're on pins and needles about the outcome. But even if you aren't, I'm sure you'll enjoy the procrastinatory entertainment. Everyone likes some pointless procrastination.


Take the Quiz
Answer each question as honestly as possible. If you don't understand the question, just go with your gut feeling. 

1. The right response to rabbits in the roadway is to shout "Watership Down!"

a. Sure, that makes complete sense.
b. Doesn't it make more sense to call out one of the rabbit names, like Fiver?
c. What's Watership Down? Why would you shout at all?

2. In the event of the zombie apocalypse, the Fried-Brains-and-Chicken shack is a win-win business proposition.
a. Absolutely. No matter who wins, you've got a popular product to sell.
b. Uh, no. Zombies don't have money. And all the chicken-buyers would just attract killer zombies.
c. Why is everyone always talking about the zombie apocalypse?

3. What is the scariest thing on earth?
a. People.
b. Clowns. Dolls. Anything with a painted-on face.
c. Disease. Car Accidents. Things that commonly kill.

4. The best way to perform a tedious task is:
a. To song. That you made up just now. About the tedious task itself.
b. With liquor or laughter or both.
c. Just get to it and get it done as quickly as possible.
5. When you see someone in a store you used to work with, you should:
a. Hide behind--or within--the nearest rack of clothing until they leave.
b. Nod and do the half smile as you walk by.
c. Stop and catch up--you haven't seen the person in forever!

Score Your Results 
A's are worth 10, B's are worth 7, and C's are worth 3. Total your score and see whether you're our kind of weird. 
47-50 - You're "our kind of weird." No one really knows what that means, but if we were forced to work on a project with you, eat lunch with you, or sit awkwardly next to you at a social event, it would probably be more awesome than terrible.

31 to 46 - You can be a little weird, and you're the type of person we gravitate to in the workplace or social situations--when we are forced to gravitate toward anyone at all. We share a bit of humor with you, although there are times when we forget to filter what we say and you get the look in your eyes that tells us it's time for us to make an awkward retreat.
0 to 30 - You may or may not be weird. We think you're pretty normal, and we try not to scare you with too much information about the inside of our heads.



  1. Here's my Score
    0 to 30 - You may or may not be weird. We think you're pretty normal, and we try not to scare you with too much information about the inside of our heads.

    1. Thanks for procrastinating with me :)

      I have a feeling that unless self-selection plays a major role, you won't be the only one with that score ;)

  2. #2 is a trick question, right? Everyone knows zombies prefer their brains raw.

    1. We are setting a new trend in brain consumption. Beer-battered brains with a side of heart biscuit. We think the zombies will come around.

  3. Why is it that Fiver is the *only* memorable name from Watership Down? I even remember that his rabbit name was something like Hrare and it meant many because they couldn't count past four. Everything else: a complete blur.

    1. Wasn't Fiver the creepy one with the dreams? That probably makes him most memorable. Although I also remember Hazel.

  4. I am only a 27, Your quiz is not accurate.

    1. Hmmm. No, I'd say that was pretty accurate. You may be weird, but you're not quite this type of weird.

      Also, you're always responding to my stories and texts with "Good Lord. Stop, the NSA might get you."